JR’s Not-So-Literal Blog

Thunderously Awake and Craving Simplicity

Posted in Uncategorized by notsoliteral on July 2, 2009

In 2005 I woke up in a terrible thunderstorm in the summer around 5:30 AM and I knew my great grandfather wasn’t on this earth anymore. I couldn’t shake the feeling, but I also had an uncontrollable urge to get out and try to run a few miles. I went for a run and felt great and later that day I found out my grandfather had passed away right around the time I woke up.

This morning I woke up in another thunderstorm. I could hear the water rushing down the hill that I live on and all I wanted to do was sell everything I own. Simplicity is what I want this morning. I’ve read about people selling everything they own only so that they have enough to fit in 2 large suitcases and maybe a backpack. My friend who travels the world did it and I’ve always envied him for it. I’ve casually talked about doing this much to the horror of my family and friends who graciously bless me with gifts throughout the year. Now I’ve compiled a whole lot of “stuff” that neither provides essential use nor does it make me feel good about myself.

I’d be curious to speak with someone who has done this or had this urge. It’s not the first time I’ve felt like selling all my belongings and hopefully it won’t be a fluke. Please feel free to leave a comment if you have felt similar or even if you think I’m being crazy James.

In the mean time, does anybody need a box of books?


6 Responses

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  1. tallredamanda said, on July 2, 2009 at 3:06 pm

    Nothing wrong with simplicity! I’m not the type to sell everything and take off, but I also don’t like having lots of STUFF around.

    Books are another story… I ALWAYS have room for more books. šŸ˜‰

    Also, I don’t think you’re crazy. If you want to go (and I know you do), then GO! And when you’re done with wherever you land, you’ll take off again. Unless/until you find somewhere that you want to stick with. Such is life.

  2. Lola Lakely said, on July 8, 2009 at 7:59 pm

    Ok so I don’t remember quite how I found you- probably through 20sb- but this sounds like something I could have written. Or at the very least felt. I have frequently woken up in the early am hours with an incredible surge of restlessness. The need to get up, get on a plane and go somewhere, anywhere that isn’t where I am at the moment is almost irresistable. And I’m not a depressed person by any stretch of the imagination. But I do get that way. Stupid family members keep me grounded in one place.

  3. notsoliteral said, on July 8, 2009 at 11:00 pm

    Lola and Amanda, depressed isn’t something I’d label myself as either. But, I definitely force myself into positions that aren’t conducive to the kind of person I wish to become and when it comes time to adjust, I usually just burst at the seems. Due to one reason or another, the last few years I spent a lot of time rationalizing that I need to stay in one place for one person and build a life that is stationary; out of obligation to the idea and others, not myself.

    I’m suddenly free of that barrier, or whatever you want to call “it” and the urges to take off and aggressively go after my professional and personal goals are right where I left them, except they’ve boiled over in some no so enjoyable manners.

    It’s anxiety that I’ve wasted time and that I’m not focused enough on what’s next. It’s also the worry that I’ve put too much emphasis in recent months on stuff that really doesn’t mean much to me in order to put on a front.

    Whether I pull a 180 degree turn and take the fuck off, or if I somehow change course while staying on the same ship, I can’t quite tell yet. But, I can tell anyone who thought they’d see me in a certain spot based of what I’ve said or how I’ve acted in the recent past, the itinerary has changed and you’ll need plan accordingly because I’ve made enough adjustments for everyone else already.

  4. Jenny Blake said, on July 29, 2009 at 4:57 am

    What a poignant story about the lightening and your grandfather. It is amazing how sometimes our bodies know things before we do – if we are willing to listen.

    Your post reminded me of a blog someone recently told me about, http://locationindependent.com that chronicles (and gives tips) for the life free from stuff that you talk about.

    I admire anyone who has the balls to leave their stuff behind and go explore the world – I say go for it, just keep us blog readers posted on your adventure!

  5. Steph said, on July 30, 2009 at 3:35 am

    I’ve struggle(d) with wanderlust and a need for simplicity. I wish it would’ve came earlier than 24-25, when I had less obligations. I wish I could take a leap of faith, but now the thought of debt keeps me situated :p

    Oh and what you said (on another post) about waking at 5:30AM knowing your grandfather passed is insane! I once took a science course that refutes these sorts of feelings/premonitions as completely impossible since they can’t be explained through scientific proof. I couldnt have disagreed more and had to drop the class.

  6. notsoliteral said, on July 30, 2009 at 3:50 am

    @Jenny keeping my blog, whether I update daily or weekly or even monthly is something I’ll always do. I love interacting with other interesting people such as yourself… gives me somewhat of a compass when my head’s in the clouds. Whether I sell everything I own or just downsize, or take off somewhere, it’ll be for a clear purpose. Probably the break I’ve been working for. Until then it’s nose to the grindstone and head to the stars.

    @Steph, I’m not religious in the faintest sense of the word, but there are SO many things in my life that are beyond me and my understanding, therefor I don’t discount anything that I experience as being simply earthy and scientific. Sometimes I use logic to steer clear of superstitions and emotions, and other times I use what I don’t know and rush forward anyways. Depends which side of this Gemini is operating things on any given day.

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